Trade secretary Liam Fox has signed deals worth more than 4.8 billion pounds with countries that do not exist, he announced triumphantly.
Fox has discovered a loophole in the EU rules allowing Britain full licenses to trade with fictional countries, and has already completed lucrative deals with Ruritania, Freedonia, Zembla and the oil-rich Qurac in the Middle East.
He said, “The EU could have free trade agreements with South Korea and Mexico, but who has given British manufacturers access to all Wakanda Vibranium reserves? This guy.
“I can not believe that I did not think of it before. Anyway, after Brexit, we become an imaginary land of wonderful dreams, and in this way we already have commercial relationships with everyone else.
“Why bother with stupid old Europe if we can send proud British miners to the subterranean towns of Pellucidar, which are in our apparently hollow earth? Mineral rights are already secured. “
Fox added, “Turkish Delight, anyone? I have made an absolutely fantastic deal with the reigning monarch of a wonderful, resource rich country that is just a cloakroom away. “